• Docks Bearded Reviews

Big Phat Monster Brush But Is Bigger Always Better?


Big Phat Beard is a company based out of Northern Ireland who like to keep things natural. A selection of fantastic beard oils and balms with butters also in development however they have another trick up their sleeve which is their Big Phat Monster Brush. Fortunately the monster brush has made its way across to my door step and has been taming my mane, but how good is it really?


What Does It Look Like?

It comes in a coated black beechwood material with Handlebar Hank laser engraved onto the front giving the product its unique look. The handle itself has ample room for you to hold an manoeuvre the brush ensuring maximum control at all times. The boars bristle is mostly black with a few tinged colours nearer the tip and with a curved arch on the formation of the wood area holding the bristles, which mimics the natural curvature of the face. The bristles are soft to the touch but when you run your hand through them, they stand firm together creating a soft resistance. The overall look is well made with a decent weight on the brush so you can feel the quality which emits from it.


What The Difference Between A Brush And A Comb?

Surprisingly enough I get told that a brush is a useless tool because it doesn't reach the underneath hairs of your beard or detangles the scruff when its knotted. The people who make these comments are 100% right, however they have completely misunderstood the need for a beard brush and the benefits behind it.

When you are going about your daily beard routine there's a few things you should be doing to ensure it remains it tip top shape. Like most people when you awake in the morning your beard will be scraggly, potentially dry from the night before within the land of nod or in my case partially wet from dribbling onto my pillow. Your morning beard routine will consist of combing your beard and applying and products for the day. Using your comb initially it will detangle the beard ensuring its ready to be styled which is no different than the hair on your head. Applying your oil and balm products will help to replenish the moisture lost. A comb is then used to evenly distribute and oil or balm giving a decent amount of styling in the same process. The comb should be nice a thick to ensure it can take product from the top of your beard and spread the product skin deep. This is where people stop and fail to realise the importance of the next step. Using a beard brush at this point continues to maximize the styling detail but once again continues to distribute the products around your beard. Where a comb has toothed edges it never leaves the top of your beard looking truly slick and defined like what a beard brush can do. An additional bonus is by continual use of a beard brush it will start to train your curly mane to grow in a set direction which you desire. This doesn't happen over night and honestly does take a long time however I presume you have no intention of shaving, so a time length for this shouldn't be an issue.

Ultimately a beard comb will give you a decent level of style and management however a brush should be used to really define your beard style and make sure your face is sculpted how you want it to be.


How Big Is It Though?

The Big Phat Beard Monster Brush is probably the biggest beard brush I have come across and without a doubt looks an absolute beast. Measuring in at 24cm or 9 1/2 inches from the top to the handle bottom, for those who haven't made it to modern society and are stuck in imperial measurements. Its has an actual bristle size of nearly 13cm, which is just over 5 inches. Lets put that into perspective :

  • The average size of a males hand from fingertip to bottom palm is 7.6 inches or 18.5cm.

  • An average Neanderthal caveman head was measured at 11iches width or 28cm in total. So pretty much half of your face.

  • A bourbon biscuit is approximately 2 inches or 5cm. No idea why this has relevancy.

  • Finally the average male erect penis size in the UK is just over 5 inches, which is weirdly ironic.


Basically its a pretty big brush to hold and the bristles size is massively adequate to get most of the hairs on a single side of your cheek in one swoop.


Also on a seperate note please wash your tape measures after reading this.


Is Bigger Really Better?

There are always pros and cons to every product which you will use. For me I have only found one con which has been brought to my attention and that's the fact that its BIG and simply not travel friendly. Unlike most combs or even some smaller brushes you can simply slip them into your pocket and have a quick brush of your beard when no one is looking however that's simply not the case with the monster brush. Its not a piece of kit you can hide away for a quick brush but to be honest I wouldn't want to hide this beast.

The bristle size is simply magnificent and allows for maximum coverage of your beard in minimal swipes, with it managing to cover probably around 90% of one side of my cheek per swipe. Using the brush allows the soft bristles glide through your beard like butter and smooths over your unruly hairs leaving most in check. As it glides through your beard you can feel the bristles caressing your beard with enough firmness to detangle and smooth the top layer but not enough to feel rough or pull your beard so its uncomfortable. The arch within the bristles help to follow the natural curvature of the face and this ensures any oils or balms are being spread more evenly. The use of a handle gives extra control to the user and feels more natural when the product is in hand. Unlike most brushes where you don't have any handle but instead you need to hold the brush over the top of the bristle. The monster brush has a design very similar to a hair brush with its handle. This makes the grooming process feel a more comfortable in hand rather than try to create a weird eagle claw grip holding the brush and running it through your face. The perks of the handle is to create more control and also more leverage when changing angles across your face which once again makes the grooming task a lot less laborious.

Size, design and quality all play a big part in the creation of the monster brush and for me its undoubtedly the best brush I have ever used and quiet easily one of the best beard brushes on the market right now. The monster brush constantly sells out quickly and you can see why. Its called a monster brush for a reason so when purchasing you will need to be aware its not something which is discrete but it does look amazing, it out performs anything else around, its feels well made and its just a fantastic product which is an essential bit of kit for your beard care routine.


Use DOCK10 for 10% off of any products from Big Phat Beard.

If You Would Like To Purchase The Big Phat Monster Brush Then Please Click Here

Big Phat Beard Monster Brush Please Click Here.

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